ya-got-ta-wanna...author unknown

Found this sah-weet poem in an old journal of mine...I don't know who it's by, and the name I have on it is 'ya-got-ta-wanna'...I hope that's really what it's called. Enjoy!

If you want a thing bad enough to go out and fight for it

Work day and night for it,

Give up your time and your peace and your sleep for it

If only the desire of it

Makes you mad enough never to tire of it

Makes you hold all things tawdry and cheap for it

Life seems all empty and useless without it

And all that you scheme

and dream

Is about it

If gladly you'll sweat for it

fret for it

plan for it

Lose all your terror of devils and men for it

If you'll simply go after the thing that you want

With all your capacity

strength and sagacity

Faith, hope and confidence, stern pertinacity

If neither cold, poverty, famish or gaunt

Nor sickness nor pain

of body or brain

Can keep you away from the thing that you want

If dogged and grim and beseech and beset

You'll get it.  You'll get it. -Author Unknown

THE Cheerleader.

All the best stuff I've read on marriage (and when I say "best" I mean the stuff that's hit me the hardest and felt the most right in my heart), has deemed the wife as the family "cheerleader".  Thank goodness that doesn't mean I have to go around with pom-poms stuck to my hands, shouting things like "GEW...TEAM...GEW!" (gew....as in "go", only for some reason cheerleaders say it like "gew") and jumping around the house (though I'm sure my husband wouldn't mind the short skirt). 

Over the years, I've learned more and more what that means and what a difference it makes to cheer on the people around me, especially and most importantly my husband.  The absolute best advice I've ever, and I mean EVER heard came from a dear friend of mine.  She got it from her mom.  And let me tell you about her mom...she is the most incredible, wise, soft, beautifully feminine person I have ever known, and I've loved her since the second I met her (or I'm pretty sure I have.  I can't remember the first time I met her, but I'm sure I loved her).  You'd love her too. 

Anyway, my dear sweet friend (we'll call her Kate) and her husband (we'll call him Jack).  {So I've been catching up on Lost...those are the first names that came to mind - haha!}  So Kate and Jack were really struggling financially.  Jack's company had shut down and he'd been out of a job for a couple of months.  Luckily they had some savings, but it was starting to dry up.  Anyone who's ever been in a situation close to that knows that things can get more than a little tense.

So one day, Kate was driving around and just lost it.  I don't know that she ever got around to telling me exactly what she was feeling, but I'm sure she was feeling scared and frustrated and helpless at the situation.  Oh - I forgot to mention they have a little boy that she stayed home to take care of.  I guess the baby better be called Aaron. ;)  Back to driving around - Kate called her wonderful and wise mom, and her first words went something like this, {bawling} "Mom, I don't know what we're going to do.  We were doing okay, but now we're running out of money and Jack still doesn't have a job and ....."  Now you'll find out why I think Kate's mom is so amazing.  HER first words to her sweet daughter were, "Kate, stop crying.  Is Jack there?  You better not have cried in front of Jack because if you think this is hard for you, then you better believe it's hard for him."

Talk about a reality check.  Kate got a hold of herself and listened to the rest of her mom's advice.  For the sake of making things as easy to understand as possible, I will put her advice in a list:

1.  Smile.  Smile at him every chance you get.  First thing when he walks into the house or into the room.  Make sure he knows you're happy that he's around.  If you're not, smile anyway.

2.  Trust him.  He is a smart and loving man.  Don't you go out and get a job, that will make him think you don't trust him and you'll end up an over-worked woman who is bitter that she's supporting her family.  He's a smart guy - let him figure this out and he will.  Do your job the best you can - make your home comfortable, be happy and make him a sandwich when he's at home during lunch time.

3. Don't nag.  Ever.  If you feel like nagging or getting upset, go to him and give him a backrub and a kiss instead.

4.  Don't give him advice unless he asks for it.  Bite. your. tongue.  No "you shoulds" or "have you trieds".  He's got it.  Don't make him feel accoutable to you.  Let him figure it out.

5. Don't cry.  If you can't help it, cry in the shower.  Take a walk if you have to.  Call me or your best friend or your sister and vent and cry all you want.  But don't cry or pout to him.  Show him that you have faith and trust in him by loving him, not by crying and making him feel worse.  Just because he doesn't talk about it doesn't mean he doesn't feel like a failure for not being able to give you everything you want.

6. Hug him.  Go home and apologize.  Put your arms around his neck and tell him you're sorry and that you were wrong.  That you trust him to be able to take care of you.

7. You need to be the one person he can go to for unconditional love, support and kindness.  The world is a harsh place and if he hasn't found a job yet, that means he's getting rejected all day long.  Don't be one more person he feels rejected by.

Kate did what her mom told her to do.  The first thing she did when she got home was put her arms around Jack's neck, kiss him, and apologize for nagging and not trusting him.  His attitude changed over night.  Things didn't get better financially, Jack took a couple more months to find a job, but they were happy and their marriage is stronger because of it.  Kate felt good about doing the best she could at her job of taking care of Jack and Aaron and making them feel loved.

I'm not a man, but I think that in the end, all a man wants is the wife he married.  Weren't we all unconditionally supportive, smiley, lovey women when we were dating our husbands?  I think we could all be a little more that way and a little less...well....not that way. :)

My husband's only comment when I told him what Kate's mom said was, "I think she's right on." I think so too.  So good luck to you in your cheerleading.  Don't beat yourself up when you don't feel like you're doing it right.  I think it's an art that Kate's mom has obviously spent years perfecting (though I'm sure she would disagree if she knew I called it or her perfect).

Here's to you and your marriage and cheering your hubby to great things!  {Back hand-spring, stick the cheer pose, hold it aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand..........jump up, spirit hands, woooo!  gew team!}

on problem-solving...

We've all got problems...what about solutions?

"It is easy to let ourselves get wrapped up in the problem, rather than focusing on the solution.  I've watched some people obsess with their problem so much, it's almost as if talking about it soothes them.  I suspect that's because problems are concrete; we can identify them easily and that provides the illusion of control.  The solution, on the other hand, is multi-faceted. 
It requires honesty, creativity, determination, patience and focus." - Eric Harr

If God has allowed us to go through trials, that probably means that He believes we have the power to find the solutions.  Let's spend today looking for the answers instead of focusing on the questions in our lives.  Happy Hunting! :)

Zucchini Fritters

So I saw this recipe in a magazine at my cousin's house, and thought it sounded yum-a-licious.  Plus, one more way to get rid of the oodles and oodles of zucchini in my garden.  I haven't tried it out (this is the first recipe I've posted that I haven't a) tried and b) LOVED).  Try it out and let me know what you think - I'll do the same this weekend.

ZUCCHINI FRITTERS

Ingredients:

1 large zucchini, finely chopped

1 small onion, chopped
3 eggs, beaten
1/2 cup freshly grated Romano cheese
1 cup milk
2 cups all-purpose flour
salt and pepper to taste
garlic powder to taste
onion powder to taste
dried parsley (optional)
1/4 cup vegetable shortening

Directions:
In a large bowl, mix together the zucchini, onion, eggs, Romano cheese, milk, and flour. Season with salt, pepper, garlic powder, onion powder, and parsley. Heat about 1 tablespoon of shortening in a large skillet over medium heat. Drop 1/4 cupfuls of the batter into the skillet, and flatten slightly with the back of a spatula. Turn fritters over when the center appears dry. Cook on the other side until golden brown. Set aside and keep warm. Add more shortening to skillet as needed, and continue with remaining batter.

Dear Self....

Dear Self,

Every day, we work our tushies off (figuratively speaking, of course...which is unfortunate) for the people around us.  We make sure everyone gets breakfast, lunch, dinner and snacks.  We wash the clothes, we clean the bathroom and keep everything pretty and dust-free.  I've lost track of how many times we've done the dishes this week or how many times we've put the pillows back on the couch and lovingly fluffed them up.  And we always get dressed and dolled up right before Jeff walks in the door, so he has a pretty wife to look at (little does he know we spend the day doing chores and cleaning spit up - among other accidents - so we don't bother getting ready until then).  We do a million things a day for the people we love, because well, we do love them.  But it's time we did something just for us.

Starting today, lets get ready first thing in the morning.  This means shower AND hair AND make-up, so we don't spend the day feeling ugly and worn down.  Jeff can take care of whatever might be going on that we would otherwise take care of for 30 minutes while we get ready.  And second, lets start taking at least one 15-minute walk every day.  I don't know how, but I know it will make life even more blissful.

Other than that, I have no complaints.  Life is pretty good.  Looking forward to that walk later today and a shower before anything else in the morning.

Love,
Me

Chocolatey Zucchini Cake

This is my husband's favorite kind of cake.  Well....it's a tie between this and rhubarb cake.  Weird.  Anyway, I think he got this recipe when he took a foods class in high school, which you know he took only because it was the only chance he'd get to eat in class. :)  It's written in a little index card booklet in his best high-school-boy penmanship with about 30 other recipes.  Pretty presh if you ask me. :)

ZUCCHINI CAKE

Ingredients:
1/2 cup butter
1/2 cup oil (substitute 1/2 cup applesauce for less fat)
1 3/4 cups sugar
2 eggs
1 tsp vanilla
2 1/2 cups flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon cinnamon
3 tablespoons cocoa powder
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup sour milk (add 1/2 tbsp vinegar to milk and let stand 5 min)
2 cups peeled/shredded zucchini
1/2 cup chocolate chips
1/2 cup brown sugar
1/2 cup chopped nuts (optional - we've never added these before)

Directions:
Cream sugar, butter and oil, add eggs and vanilla.  Mix well.  Add dry ingredients and sour milk.  Mix in zucchini.  Pour into a 9x13 greased cake pan.  Top with chocolate chips, brown sugar and nuts.  Bake at 325 for 40-45 minutes.  Let cool.  Once cool drizzle with caramel and chocolate ice cream topping (that's what we use instead of frosting).

Zucchini Apple Slices

So I heard that this recipe, made from zucchini, tastes just like apples in an apple pie.  Of course I was skeptical, who wouldn't be??  The lady who gave it to me said that she's taken to it tons of potluck dinners over the years and has only had one person guess that it wasn't made from apples.  Pretty good odds, huh?  I decided to give it a whirl, and tricked my husband, his sister and her friend.  Works for me - it's yummy!

ZUCCHINI APPLE SLICES

Ingredients:

Filling-

12 cup zucchini

1 teaspoon Cinnamon

1 cup lemon juice

1 1/4 cups sugar

1/2 cup apple juice

Crust-

4 cups flour

1/2 teaspoon salt

1 1/2 cups sugar

1 1/2 cups butter

Directions:

Peel zucchini, remove seeds and cube.  Cook all filling ingredients (except apple juice) for 1 hour or until tender {mine only took about 30 minutes on the stove}.  Mix crust ingredients until crumbly.  Use a cookie sheet 1 1/2" deep.  Pat half of the crust into cookie pan.  Pat it down smooth.  Bake at 375 for 10 minutes.  Crust will be light brown.  Remove from oven.  Add 1/2 cup of apple juice and a generous 1 cup of crust mixture into filling.  Mix well - it will thicken up before your eyes!  Pour filling onto baked crust and sprinkle with remaining crust on top.  Bake at 375 for 30-35 minutes.  Enjoy!

Who knew you could use all that zucchini for a yummy dessert!?! :)